I know I had created this blog a long time ago, ok a REALLY REALLY long time ago and haven't blogged anything but I promise I have thought of it constantly and I feel it is now time for me to do it. There are so many things going on in my life right now and don't know how to organize everything (physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually) but I'm hoping by doing this blog it will help me. Remember, I am not a perfect person or mom but I'm trying everyday.
With that being said, what has been going on in my life? Well, where do I start? Marriage is very rocky right now. The man has PTSD and is an alcoholic. With the two combined, it takes a huge toll not only on me but my children as well. Leaving has been on my mind for some time now but I don't have the finances to do so. My dream and goal is to move to Vegas. Yes, Vegas. Why Vegas, you ask? Well, it's as close to "home" as I can get. I'm from Hawaii and some consider Vegas as the 9th island. I also feel in my heart that that's where I belong. That's where life will be great for me. My weight has also been on my mind. I'm sure all the stress I go through has alot to do with the extra padding. I have about 55 lbs to lose. I lost 75lbs recently but have also gained 20 of it back. So I'm trying to get on track with that. Beauty! Everyone is beautiful but I feel so unkept. My hair is never done, needs to be cut and styled, I never wear makeup (I don't feel pretty enough to wear it....I'm the type to wear makeup when I'm feeling pretty and not put makeup on TO feel pretty), I need my eyes checked. Seriously. I haven't had an eye exam in over 2 years and I want to get some contacts. My glasses hide my eyes. I have gotten so lazy with everything. I guess that's why I've gained weight, huh? I know it's the summer and I'm home with the kids and have no reason to be all dressed up and pretty but I feel ugly. Deep down inside I truly do feel ugly. I want to be happy. I want happiness right down to the core of my soul. I want it to shine. I'm so unorganized. I want a pretty home. Not the one I live in. I want a beautiful home. I know I can make the one I live in now beautiful but with all the negativity, it's not gonna happen. I guess everything boils down to me not being happy. Ugh! Sorry for the rambling and randomness. It's the story of my life. Ugh!
Last week Tuesday I went to a concert which I was soooo happy to have been able to go to. It was the second concert I've been to all my life. The first was some boy band. Can't remember the name but I can remember going and who I went with. It was for my 12th birthday. Anyhoo, I went to a concert with Justin Young, Anuhea, and Trevor Hall. I wasn't able to stay for the latter but I'm very happy with seeing Justin and Anuhea. For those of you who don't know them, they are from Hawaii. Very well known singers. I'm from Hawaii but live in Houston so it was a big deal to me. I went alone. I was find with that. Wish my BFF came with me but she couldn't make it. I also got to meet a FB friend while there. I have never met her face to face before but I got to that night. It wasn't planned, I promise. Just happened that way. But, I had a good time and so happy to have had a break away from my kids. Not that I don't love them cause I really do. Just an unperfect mommy needs time away once in awhile. Let's see if I can add a link to Youtube so you can see who Anuhea is. She is so pretty with such a beautiful voice and sweet spirit. It just radiates from her. I think I need to go back home. Those from Hawaii will understand that statement. But I will never forget where I'm from. Ok, let me try it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5XGvDAjOps&feature=relmfu Ok, hopefully that works. I'm still learning this whole blogging thing, I'm not perfect so bear with me please.
This morning I did a face brightener. I think you should try it. I guess this is one of the things I'm trying to organize and better myself with. Beauty. It's 3 tbsp baking soda mixed with 1 tbsp water. Mix to a paste and apply to face. Leave it on for 5 minutes and rinse off with warm water. Trust me, your face will feel so much better when it's rinsed off. So much smoother. And do this once a week. So my goal for that is to do it every Monday morning. Let's see if I can keep up with that now.
I'm so sorry I'm so random. Like I said, it's the story of my life.
Next on my list of goals/routines is to do a Monday exercise of 30 minutes of an evening walk, 50 crunches, 50 squats and 50 jumping jacks. Whos' with me on this one? I don't blame you if you don't want to. But I really need to get on track with my weight loss. I have got to force myself. Tomorrow I will post a before picture of myself so that I can keep track and hopefully inspire you to get on track to a healthier life.
Who does Pinterest? I am the queen of Pinterest. I am a Pinja. That is where I am getting alot of my ideas from for weight loss, beauty, organization, healthy eating, recipes, the house, and much much MUCH more.
Ok, I think that is enough brain overload for all of us. I will see you tomorrow!!!
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